The Creative Art of Quilting

Quilts by Marijke Vroomen Durning

This art form is good for your health, helps you stay connected and provides purpose


By Marijke Vroomen Durning

If you’re among the 7 to 10 million quilters in the United States, you likely already know how quilting can have a positive impact on your life. Studies have shown crafting can have a healing effect on the mind, but did you know the art of quilting may help restore or maintain your health?

Quilting Offers a Sense of Belonging 

With families and friends spread out across the country, it’s easy to feel disconnected. Unlike many other crafts, quilting can provide the sense of community that has been lost. A few generations ago, women held quilting bees to gather and work on quilts. Today’s equivalent is the quilting guild, where quilters gather to learn about quilting, share creations, work on community projects and reach out to other quilters who need support.

Bonnie Wright, a retired occupational therapy assistant, found this support when quilting helped her adapt to her new home. After moving to Mount Cobb, Pa., following her husband’s death, Wright sought out and joined a guild, so she could meet people. There she met a woman who held smaller meetings in her home. “It’s what I needed,” Wright said. “With this group, I feel like I made the friendships I needed so badly.”

Dana Howell, program director of the occupational therapy department at Eastern Kentucky University, had a similar experience after moving to Seattle and then going through a bad break-up. “I was in a really rough spot, so I started taking a quilting class through a local community college in 1996. To this day, that was one of the most supportive groups of women I have ever been involved with,” she said.

Howell went on to write a paper about the restorative qualities of quilting, which was published in the Journal of Occupational Science in 2000.

Restoring Health

Ricky Tims, a world-renowned quilter, quilt teacher, and designer who lives in La Veta, Colo., underwent quadruple bypass surgery 18 years ago. While he doesn’t credit quilting for his overall recovery, it did play a role. A week after Tims returned home, he was bored, but his activities were limited.



Credit: Compliments of Marijke Vroomen Durning

“I couldn’t lift anything heavier than a 5-pound sack of sugar,” he explained. “I wanted to do what I loved, and that was quilting.” Tims began making a quilt to commemorate his surgery. “I just wanted to get back into the game. It allowed me to stay active and motivated, and that is good mental medicine,” he noted.

Quilting can help patients regain mobility, particularly if they have had a neurological deficit from a stroke or brain injury, said Howell. “There are multiple studies to show that actually performing a task is much better than simulating it,” she added. You can have a patient picking fabric and reaching for it with her or his dominant arm, she explained. “Even if they don’t have the motor control to actually quilt at that moment, we can do lots of things to engage them in the quilting process.”

Tims adds that quilting can help people get through difficult or trying times. For example, when his father was ill, his quilt work helped him get through those days. “Sometimes quilting is a way to manage a crisis situation that may not be one’s own health, but someone close, and this includes the loss of a loved one,” said Tims.

Wright experienced this as well when her husband was undergoing treatment for cancer. “The only way I got through that was with quilting. I would sit with him in the hospital, or when he was having chemotherapy, and I would always have some quilting with me. It would give me something to focus on so I wouldn’t see he was miserable,” she said.

Howell’s paper explains why quilting can have this effect. The personal meaning behind a quilt’s creation, the rituals, the repetitive actions involved in the sewing and the attention the quilt assembly requires all result in a meditative quality, and this can make time pass quickly.

“Each aspect of quilting is unique and novel, and requires efficient attention and other cognitive abilities,” Howell wrote. “This challenge of performing each unique aspect of the project is characterized by focus, intention, and precision, and is praised as restorative by some quilters.”

Improving Mental Health and Decreasing Isolation



Credit: Compliments of Marijke Vroomen

Twelve years ago, Michelle Napoli, an art therapist and mental health counselor in Massachusetts, founded the Survivor Quilt Project. Napoli is a trauma specialist who uses quilting to help incest survivors. Trauma overwhelms the normal processing system, she explained, so survivors may be unable to talk about what happened. However, art therapy can help them identify things when words can’t. “You symbolize how you understand something before you can find the words,” she said.

In projects such as Napoli’s, community quilting projects allow quilters to interact with others while they create. “It’s with the support of other people and when you make the quilt, the conversations can decrease the isolation and confusion you may feel,” she explained.

Wright experienced this in her work, too. “There was one psychiatric facility where the patients and I made several quilts and hung them in the gym,” she said. “It was very satisfying for them to see their work there.” In another program, the women in Wright’s group were tired of the traditional arts and crafts programs, but many wanted to learn how to sew. It was a good problem-solving activity for them as they learned how to pick fabric, decide on the colors, use a sewing machine and work as a group, she said.

“A lot of them had low self-esteem and no hobbies,” Wright said. “Why teach them something in the hospital if they can’t carry it over when they go home?”

Quilting as We Age

Quilting is a physical activity, and as our bodies change, so do our abilities. But crafters are often motivated to stay as healthy as possible so they can continue their art for as long as possible.

“A lot of us have had cataracts removed so we can see and quilt more,” Wright said. “I told my eye doctor, ‘I can’t see the thread and needle, you have to fix this.’ So he said that it was because I had cataracts and I needed new lenses.”

Getting older doesn’t mean quilters can’t learn new tricks. Arthritic fingers can make it hard to hand quilt, but then it’s time to learn how to machine quilt or even to use a long-arm machine, like Wright did.

Learning new skills is a fun way to keep the mind and body sharp. You can take up more complex patterns or different skills as you want or as your body dictates.

“Quilting gives you the opportunity to learn something at your own pace,” Wright said. “It’s not something you have to learn all at once.”


© Next Avenue - 2018. All rights reserved.

 

An Emotional Playbook for Couples in Retirement

Credit: Adobe Stock

6 tips to navigate a time of life that brings so many changes

By Joan Fischer

We’d only been retired for a few weeks when the questions started coming.

“How’re you doing with so much time together?” we heard from friends, both the still-working and the long-retired alike, their voices knit with concern.

I was a little puzzled. My husband and I had been married for nearly 35 years and got along just fine. What mysteries could possibly await us?

Yet apparently we’d stumbled onto new ground in Elder Country, where each couple must blaze their own trail. We met one pair who can’t get enough of each other, traversing the country in the close quarters of an RV and spending months at a time volunteering at national parks, often living in remote sites with no TV, cell or Wi-Fi.

And on the other end of the spectrum, we met a couple who’d agreed to more or less ignore each other until 5 p.m. on weekdays, mimicking the schedule they’d kept during their working lives. This was not done with any hostility; it was simply a pattern of interaction that worked for them.

Where would we fit in?

As time went on, I realized that our concerned friends had a point: Retired couples do need to hash things out.

The stakes are high. While nearly 80 million boomers are retiring at a rate of some 10,000 per day, according to the Social Security Administration and other sources — the divorce rate of older Americans is also rising. Among people ages 65 and older, divorces have roughly tripled since 1990. At least some of that discontent is caused by problems that surface in retirement.

Couples in Retirement: Preparing for the Next Stage

“Due to our heightened expectations of marriage and also to our healthier life spans, most people are no longer willing to stay in a boring marriage ‘until death do us part,’” noted sociologist Stephanie Coontz, director of research at the Austin, Texas-based Council on Contemporary Families.

But even if divorce is not on the menu, couples need to prepare — beyond finances and health care — for a life stage that brings so many changes. Most of us don’t blithely stumble into marriage or childbirth, perhaps because those transitions carry so many obvious red flags. Retirement, on the other hand, seems like 100 percent ease, a hard-earned gift of time. In spite of that, couples need an “emotional playbook,” said Miriam Goodman, author of Too Much Togetherness: Surviving Retirement as a Couple.

Navigating the Challenges, Enjoying the Experience

Luckily for all of us, a number of sociologists and other experts have weighed in on marital harmony in retirement. Here are six key pieces of advice:

Communicate clearly “It’s not you, it’s me.” If one of you needs more alone time, make sure your partner understands it’s a part of your nature, rather than a rejection of his or her company. Presumably, your spouse knows a bit about your temperament after so many years together, but a whopping 40 hours a week of newly freed time can be a wake-up call to each partner’s needs and plans. A need for “more space” can be addressed quite literally by designating separate rooms for each partner as mostly his or hers, if possible.

Cultivate separate hobbies and friendships “Couples should focus on building their individual social lives to avoid becoming too dependent on each other or spending too much time together,” advised sociologist Rob Pascale, co-author (with Louis H. Primavera and Rip Roach) of The Retirement Maze: What You Should Know Before and After You Retire. “In addition to maintaining and strengthening existing friendships, retirees can consider joining clubs and organizations so they have opportunities for developing new independent relationships.”

Spend time with others as a couple “People report the happiest feelings when they socialize with their partner and other adults, not just with the partner,” said Coontz. “And a whole lot of studies show that having friends beyond your family or spouse as you age is an extremely important contribution to people’s mental and physical well-being. It’s a protective factor on the same order as keeping physically fit and not smoking.”

Understand that retirement brings different challenges for men and women By most accounts, men have the tougher time. Many women have moved in and out of the workforce while raising children, and, culturally, have been encouraged to place a higher value on close friendships. They’ve also been assigned more of the day-to-day domestic activities that await the retiree.

The emphasis of men’s role as providers first and foremost, spending less time cultivating friendships and managing the home, leaves many men more at a loss when the workweek vanishes. That, in turn, can become a problem for women who find their husbands suddenly underfoot.

Couples can kill two birds with one stone by: a) agreeing that each partner will pursue new activities and friendships and b) negotiating an equal division of domestic chores, even if the woman had done the lion’s share while both partners worked.

Partners who both work should retire at the same time, if possible “Researchers have found that when spouses retire together, the marriage is seldom affected by their joint decision; good marriages will stay good and bad marriages bad. But problems can occur when only half of a two-income couple retires,” said Pascale.

By retiring together, partners avoid such issues as changes in the dynamics of the relationship —only one person “bringing home the bacon,” for example, can cause problems — or interference with the retired partner’s ability to participate in certain types of activities or social events. Retiring together also provides each partner with some emotional support as they try to adjust to their new living arrangements, Pascale noted.

Allow yourselves time to adjust “Be patient with each other,” said Goodman. It takes time and experimentation to find a groove. Maybe one partner will decide to take a part-time job or a significant volunteering commitment that feels like a job, while the other is happy with less structure.

It is sobering to recognize that retirement represents our last years of life, our time to finally do whatever we wish — health and resources permitting. That freedom is a tremendous gift; one that, with good communication and understanding, couples can make the most of together.

Giving In to the Coloring Craze

Credit: Thinkstock

 

Why am I spending so much time doing something that may be a waste of time?

By Jill Smolowe for Next Avenue 

“So, be honest,” I say to my husband. “Is this stupid?”

I’ve just shown him my latest masterpiece, a mandala [an Indian symbol representing the universe] that swirls with a rich assortment of colors. After oohing and ahhing appropriately, he says, “No, it’s not stupid. I think it’s a pleasant way to pass time.”

“Nothing more?”

For my 61st birthday, my husband gave me an enormous cache of gel pens that initially made me cringe. Too much, I thought.

“Nothing more.”

This is what I dread. I am wasting time. “No aesthetic value?”

“No, but that’s not why you’re doing it.”

He reminds me that, having acted on my curiosity about the adult coloring book craze sweeping the country, I find the activity relaxing, absorbing and an antidote to stress. He doesn’t understand my problem.

“You play Words With Friends. Why is this any different?”

Because it is, I insist. Fun apart, word games can help build vocabulary (dutifully I look up words I don’t recognize — then promptly forget them), ward against Alzheimer’s (maybe), keep my mind active.

They are, in a word, productive (sort of).

“Why do you have to accomplish something?” he presses. “Does coloring quiet your mind?” Yes.

“Is a half-hour of meditating wasting time?” No, not at all.

Being Here Now

Meditation helps me to focus. To immerse in the now. Which is what this coloring stuff does, too — to my surprise and delight. I haven’t had an outlet for my virtually non-existent art skills since elementary school. Painting, ceramics, needlework, none of it has attracted me. But this I really enjoy. The world recedes. Time flies by.

So why am I having trouble accepting that coloring mandalas with Magic Markers and gel pens is a legitimate way to spend my time? Sitting out on my porch, I become so absorbed in the challenge of finding new combinations of colors that at times I enter the complete immersion state known as flow — an experience that, until now, I’ve been able to achieve only when writing. That, in and of itself, suggests the exercise is worthwhile.

Yet I still can’t quite accept that it’s perfectly OK to spend time coloring. An hour here, two hours there. Never mind that it provides me with an excuse to dip into music I haven’t listened to in ages (Diane Krall, Van Morrison, Bob Marley). Surely there is more value to this than I realize.

Consulting a Color Expert

Seeking explanation, I invite Amy Wax to lunch. The author of Can’t Fail Color Schemes, Amy is a color consultant whose company, Your Color Source Studios, helps people select colors for the interiors and exteriors of their homes. When I tell her, a bit red-faced, about my new coloring habit, she lights up with pleasure.

“Coloring brings out our creative side,” she tells me. “There are no rules. It allows you to push limits.”

Though I like the sound of this, I remain skeptical. I’m just coloring inside of someone else’s lines, I say. I mean, it’s not really mine. Is it any more creative than, say, doing one of those paint-by-numbers pictures we used to do as kids?

“It is,” she says firmly. “Those pictures, they all look the same. These mandalas of yours, you made the choices. You’re creating this. No two are the same. That’s what makes it art.”

Art? Come on.

What Is Art?

“Art is a lofty term, but it’s appropriate,” she says. “You’re taking something two-dimensional and creating an illusion of three-dimensionality with the push and pull of the colors.” Think of it as collaborative, she says. Though someone else did the design, “It’s still yours.”

She points to my small assortment of completed pictures. “People are afraid of too much color. Once they take the baby step, they want to explore,” notes Wax.

Yup. With each successive mandala, I’ve incorporated more and bolder colors. Then, for my 61st birthday, my husband gave me an enormous cache of gel pens that initially made me cringe. Too much, I thought.

Not true, I quickly learned, as I began to experiment with the effects I could get from so many different shades and tones.

“I find it almost mathematical,” I say to Wax. “I feel instinctively that if I’m going to make all these colors work together, there has to be symmetry.”

“The mathematical part is what makes it succeed,” she explains. “You’re creating a world of balance.” Up the road, she suggests, I might want to experiment with asymmetry.

Hmmm. Hadn’t considered that.

“Look, playing with colors is whimsical,” she says. “It’s freedom to express yourself. It’s a tool to enhance visual awareness.”

All good, I allow. But in the end, jeez, I’m just coloring in a coloring book.

Wax laughs. “I feel the term ‘coloring book’ is holding you back. A coloring book is, by definition, juvenile. What you are doing here is not juvenile.”

The Precious Present

I pull out the three (yes, three!) books that I’ve purchased. Only one owns up to being an “adult coloring book.” The other two bill themselves respectively as “color art” and “color pad therapy.” Perhaps anticipating resistant types like myself, one of the two showcases a higher purpose in its subtitle: “anti-stress coloring pages.”

Recently, I read that some psychologists recommend coloring as therapeutic for grief, as well.

“It’s inspiring creative parts of you that have been dormant,” Wax says. “You’re getting something from this, which is why you keep going back to it.”
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But. I’m still a 61-year-old woman sitting on my porch coloring pictures with a proliferating assortment of markers and gel pens.

My 22-year-old daughter, blessed from birth with artistic ability, rolls her eyes when I share my doubts. “I can’t believe you think that way,” she says. Supportive of my new hobby, she has no patience for my reservations. “You enjoy it. That should be enough. Just keep coloring. Don’t ruin it for yourself.”

She’s right, of course.

But in case I didn’t internalize her wise admonition, a few days later I come across this from spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle in his 2005 bestseller, A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. “You are present when what you are doing is not primarily a means to an end (money, prestige, winning) but fulfilling in itself.”

Even I can appreciate that being present in the moment is a beautiful thing.

One Surprising Way Older Adults Can Get Healthier

Credit: Adobe Stock 

You know about the obvious things. Now try this. 

By Dr. Ann Hwang for Next Avenue

Whether or not we actually do the right things to improve our health, many of us probably assume we know what they are. Walk more. Quit smoking. Eat healthier.

It’s a familiar list, and a good one. As a primary care doctor, I spend plenty of time counseling people to do exactly these things. But here’s another, less familiar thing I think you should consider: get engaged in your community. 

The Benefits of Connection 

Civic engagement may not be on the top of everyone’s to-do list, but it probably should be. There is intriguing evidence to suggest that people who are engaged in their communities — through activities like participating in local organizations or volunteering — could also have better health. 

For example, older adults who volunteer are less likely to have high blood pressure or cardiovascular disease; they face a lower risk of cognitive impairment and they might even delay death.

Additionally, forming social connections might be particularly helpful in combatting social isolation and loneliness, a growing problem especially among older adults. People who are socially isolated may have increased risk for premature death and some have estimated that the negative impact of social isolation and loneliness could be a greater public health threat than obesity.

Living alone’ having a mobility or sensory impairment; going through a major life transition (like losing a spouse) or being a caregiver for someone with a severe impairment are common scenarios facing older adults. They are also risk factors for isolation.

Yet despite the potential benefits, the average American is becoming less and less engaged. Participation in clubs and civic organizations has fallen by more than half over the last 25 years and polls suggest growing distrust and pessimism about our political system.
Stories of Hopeful Change

In our work at the Center for Consumer Engagement in Health Innovation, we’ve seen the possibility and promise of change. We support advocates and leaders — particularly people who have significant health care needs or come from low-income communities — who are actively engaged in working to make the health system more responsive and person-centered.

People like Lezrette Hutchinson, a working mother of three who experienced homelessness after a fire and had significant health challenges after a diagnosis of sarcoidosis, a serious inflammatory condition. Hutchinson got treatment, but she didn’t stop there. She formed a recreational support group for people 50+ and joined the patient advisory board of her health system, saying “we wanted doctors to listen to us.”

Now, despite her ongoing illness, she feels the power of having a larger purpose. Hutchinson says: “I became an activist so I could let new people know it was going to be OK.”

Or Kathy Paul, a 69-year-old woman who advocates for better health care policies for older adults with the Massachusetts Senior Action Council. When her husband died, it was a turning point in her life.

She explains, “With more time on your hands, what do you do? Just sit in the house, stare at the walls and complain, or get out and do something about it? What our group likes to say is, ‘We don’t just take it, we take charge!’” 

Everybody Wins 

As the National Academy of Medicine recently summarized, actively engaging consumers as partners in health care is a win-win proposition, for all of us and for the health system. Health care leaders and policymakers interested in improving health would do well to focus on building more opportunities for engagement for consumers and the communities they serve. 

So if you’d like to improve your health, consider looking for ways to become active in your community. Get involved with a local community organization, drive someone to the polls, join a committee at your place of worship. Find a way to get engaged. Help yourself and help others at the same time.

© Next Avenue - 2018. All rights reserved.

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Take the Time to Better Care for Yourself

Credit: Adobe Stock

7 steps to the self-care you need
By Ken Druck for Next Avenue

Becoming a smarter, stronger, more self-caring version of yourself is both freeing and empowering.

I recently discussed the concept of self-care and the ways to set yourself up for — and avoid sabotaging — the way you take emotional and physical care of yourself. After you agree that you are worthy of self-care and will overcome the factors you let stand in your way before, you’re ready to move forward with these seven steps to self-care:

Step No. 1. Make the Decision to Change the Way You Take Care of Yourself

Undertaking change of this magnitude and importance takes courage, humility, conviction and a vision of your best possible future. These steps allow you to say “Yes!” to yourself. You have a right to do the things that make life better, easier, less stressful and more joyful and to say “No” to the people and things draining and depleting you. Sustainable change requires a promise that you make to yourself: “I will do whatever is necessary to become the better (more self-caring, self-respecting) version of myself.” You may not know exactly how you’re going to change deeply ingrained, habitual thinking and behavior, but you are 100 percent committed to finding out and following through.

Step No. 2. Define Your End Goal

Begin to sketch out how you want it all to look and feel after you’ve succeeded. Perhaps you’re sleeping longer, exercising regularly, eating better and speaking to yourself with greater kindness/compassion. You may be ready to hand in your resignation as someone’s doormat, whipping post, dumping ground and enabler in favor of a more reciprocal relationship. Or you may be a “pleaser” who’s ready to face your own fears about letting people down.

Some of us have gotten used to following the elephant around the circus with a shovel. And we’re just waking up. Something is shifting inside of us, declaring, “Enough!” and “It’s time!” We are ripe for a change.

So, whatever your end goal, take the time to state what it is. Get clear about your desired outcome by writing it down, as in: “The return on my investment of learning greater self-care is going to be ______.

Step No. 3. Make a List of Things/People You Need to Say “No” To

Write down 15 people and things you need to learn how to say “No” to. Begin each sentence with “The people I need to learn how to say ‘No’ to are …” or “I need to learn how to say ‘No’ when . . .” Some of us are born caregivers, pleasers and rescuers. Having spent a good part of our lives taking care of other people’s needs, we almost automatically say “Yes” to others who seem to require assistance. We do this even to the neglect of our own health and well-being.

But now it’s time to stop putting yourself and the people you cherish at risk by overcommitting to things that are not in your best interest. Prioritizing and saying “No” may be quite difficult in the beginning. Old feelings of guilt, obligation and responsibility are hard to kick. After a while, however, you’ll begin to feel 100 percent better and thank yourself for staying strong. The people who matter to you will still love you, and the ones who depended on you to say “Yes” even when it wasn’t right will be somebody else’s problem. The results of learning to say “No” speak (loudly) for themselves.

Step No. 4. Lighten Your Load, Unburden Yourself and Allow Yourself Some Pleasure

Although it may be terribly unpopular (years of training the people around you that with a little guilt, you’ll do anything), it’s time to begin letting folks know that you’re in the process of making a change.

Learning to delegate and share and assign responsibility to others, like any new skill, takes time and practice. You may be unaccustomed to the patience, kindness, encouragement and support you get from others. And you may be unfamiliar with the act of giving yourself permission to turn off the computer and phone and just take a hot bath. Don’t let the old voices of self-criticism, fear and condemnation weaken your resolve, as they once did. Continue to get clear about the things that lighten your heart and your load. Set yourself free to delight in and savor the goodness of life. And, most of all, give yourself permission to be happy.

Step No. 5. Listen to Yourself

Sometimes the best source of wise counsel comes from within. Stop, go to a quiet place, take a deep breath and tune in to yourself. Listen to the inner voice that tells you to “slow down,” “relax” and “take it easy” — the one that gives you the encouragement, strength and guidance you need to take care of yourself in the best way possible. Listening to the kindest, most patient, supportive, forgiving and nurturing parts of yourself is always a good thing when it comes to self-care. So, stay strong. Don’t allow any of your self-care saboteurs to talk you out of what you now know is best for you.

Step No. 6. Find or Create Self-Care Opportunities in All Your Relationships

The choices you make in your relationships are as much a reflection of your willingness and ability to practice self-care as any other factor. Relationships are also one of life’s greatest testing grounds for discovering, learning and practicing self-care. Balancing taking care of your relationships with family, aging parents, kids, friends and co-workers with taking care of yourself is one of life’s greatest challenges. Keep reminding yourself that it’s no longer OK to cave in — and that you can do this!

Step No. 7. Pat Yourself on the Back for a Job Well Done

When it comes to taking better care of yourself, every step forward, including baby steps, is worthy of an encouraging, congratulatory pat on the back. You did it! Despite the fear and resistance that comes with change, you are summoning the courage and strength to become the better, more caring version of yourself. This is difficult (inner and outer) work, not to be taken for granted or glossed over. By stopping and appreciating yourself, you are writing new chapters in the books The Care and Feeding of Me and My Honor Code for the Work I Do.

Self-care is your hand resting gently on your heart. Giving yourself your due has nothing to do with selfishness, entitlement, arrogance or taking food out of someone else’s mouth. Self-care is a gift born of a humble gratitude for the life you’ve been given and the person you are. Self-care is a work in progress. So, take every opportunity to implement and improve your master plan. Don’t wait until a crisis or the end of your life to grant yourself permission to indulge in loving self-care — or to finally feel deserving of it. Do it now!

My wish is that you cultivate life-affirming, health-giving self-care practices. Allow yourself to receive as graciously and freely as you give. And may the gentleness, kindness, self-compassion, generosity of heart, forgiveness and permission you’re learning to give yourself spread like a warm breeze across the world. A self-caring individual, family, community, company and world is one that is resilient, compassionate, competent, productive and, ultimately, at peace.

Ready to put a new self-care plan into action? Let’s do this! Click here to print your own Self-Care Action Plan.



© Twin Cities Public Television - 2018. All rights reserved.



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AGING WELL: Worth the Investment! Your Gift Makes the Difference!

Photo by Jim Fish, Carlsbad By The Sea resident.

Front Porch and its philanthropic partners, FACT Foundation, Pacific Homes Foundation, Sunny View Lutheran Communities and Services and California Lutheran Homes and Community Services, believe our individual journeys, experiences and generosity toward others enhances the opportunity for all of us to age well with meaning and purpose.

Your support helps us to strengthen and enhance the lives of more than 5,000 individuals who are aging across our retirement and affordable housing communities. We believe aging is a gift to be enthusiastically embraced, enjoyed, supported and honored. A monetary gift of any size today makes a difference.

How do we do this?

We do this by honoring the whole person — in mind, body and spirit. Through programs and experiences that encourage engagement and honor individuals as they age, our philanthropic partners support charitable care, celebrate milestones and holidays, enhance memory care, honor those whom we have lost, attend to those who give care, and tailors cutting-edge technology to grow important and meaningful connections throughout the full experience of aging. 

We do this through your gifts, through volunteer-led programs, and programs like Operation Snowflake, a holiday fund that brings holiday cheer to families living in low-income communities managed by Front Porch subsidiary CARING Housing Ministries; Joyful Hearts Chorus, a 40-plus member choir comprised of residents living at Summer House and Villa Gardens and the Villa Gardens Health Center; as well as the Amazon Echo, voice controlled technology that assists residents in the tasks of daily living.

Giving Tuesday (#GivingTuesday), which happens annually on the Tuesday following Thanksgiving, is the international day of charitable giving. Each year, Giving Tuesday has had greater and greater impact on both our local communities and our international causes. We believe the best of giving comes from the heart, the central place of gratitude.  

Together, with many others around the world it is a day to support the causes you believe are most important and most meaningful to you and your loved ones. Giving Tuesday is a day of communal giving.  

So, thank you for investing with your gift for those you love today.

Please visit the Front Porch website “Give Now” page and consider supporting one or more of our philanthropic partners or causes.

Want to Age Better? Join a Choir

A groundbreaking study examines the health benefits of making music as we age

Credit: Getty Images

By Deborah Quilter for Next Avenue


Twenty years ago, when academic researcher Julene Johnson wanted to study how music might help the aging process, she couldn’t get funding. Johnson, a professor at the Institute for Health & Aging at the University of California, San Francisco, suspected that music might improve memory, mood and even physical function.

And, she thought, what could be more perfect than choral music? Your instrument is already in your body, and you are bathed in beautiful sound by fellow music makers. Singing in a group is fun, so there’s plenty of reason to come back week after week: You get to see your friends and exercise your vocal cords and brain all at once.

Fast forward to 2010, when Johnson won a Fulbright scholarship to study the impact of singing in the quality of life of older adults in Finland.

Why Finland?

Because there, children study arts, but they don’t stop when they get older, as so many people do in the United States. They keep singing or making music throughout their lives. In fact, in one city (population 125,000) there were more than 50 choirs — six of which were dedicated to older adults. Because of its emphasis on cradle-to-grave musical expression, Finland seemed the perfect place to study the effect of music on aging.

Music as a Force for Good

In Finland, Johnson saw the effects up close, including how making music together can build group cohesion toward a common goal.

Vocal music even played a pivotal role in Finnish history, Johnson notes. “Music was used as a political force,” she says. When Finland was ruled by Russia, citizens would meet and talk about politics. They planned how to change the future at singing festivals, which eventually led to the country’s independence.

When Johnson returned to the U.S., she was determined to learn more. So when the National Institutes of Health called for proposals to identify novel ways to promote independence and well-being in older adults, she applied for, and receive, a grant founding her Community of Voices study, the largest of its kind.

Johnson hypothesized that music participation is a cost-effective way to promote health, independence and well-being to help an increasingly diverse population of older people remain active and independent. Other studies have found that older adults who sing in choirs tend to have high rates of well-being and mood, but they didn’t address whether those effects can be attributed to choral singing or to the self-selection of the participants.
The Community of Voices Study

Johnson’s study — large, rigorous and randomized — would really put the hypothesis to the test. Involving 390 participants from 12 senior centers in the San Francisco Bay area, the Community of Voices study is unique in a few ways.

For starters, it is the first to test the effects of an arts-based intervention for older adults on improving key measures of health and well-being: cognitive health, physical functioning, emotional well-being and social connectedness.

Another difference is the deliberate recruitment of ethnically-diverse older adults. By 2030, nearly half of people over 65 are expected to come from diverse racial and ethnic backgrounds.

After participants were recruited, they were screened and given assessments that would be remeasured at six and 12 months. Participants needed to be 60 or older and have adequate vision and hearing and fluency in English or Spanish. People with significant cognitive impairment were excluded. Of the nearly 400 participants, 55 percent had not sung in a choir as an adult.

Serious About Singing in a Choir

The Community of Voices program also was different from the passive singalong approach to choruses that you might expect to see in senior centers because it was designed to include physical, social and cognitive components as well as performances.

Professional choir conductors and accompanists designed the musical program. Directors made certain adjustments for age, such as changing the key to allow for aging voices to sing without strain. But the 90-minute rehearsals involved learning new songs, paying attention to the conductor and synchronizing personal singing parts with the rest of the choir. The repertoire included Latin, African-American and Filipino music, show tunes that were tailored to each choir.

Rather than sitting the whole time, choir members stood or moved to different parts of the room. A 15-minute warm-up at the beginning of each session included vocal work, breathing and stretching movements. There was also a 10-minute refreshment break.

Measuring Outcomes

Each choir met once a week for a year, and performed three to four times in public. The average age was 71, females represented 76 percent of participants,and two-thirds were non-white. Researchers collected data about falls and the use of health care services every three months, and focused on three primary outcomes:

• Cognitive function: Attention and executive function were tested.
• Lower body strength: Participants were given a timed sit-to-stand test to assess their ability. 
• Emotional well-being: Participants were rated on the frequency of depressive symptoms including feeling down, having little interest in things, trouble sleeping, being tired, having poor appetite, feeling bad about themselves, having trouble concentrating or moving slowly. 

Participants were also tested for verbal learning and memory, social engagement, social support, loneliness, walking speed, balance and falls. 

Another key attribute was measured — self-efficacy — which Johnson defined as “people feeling like they have the power to do things for themselves.” In addition to literally building strength to sing louder, Johnson notes that singing can help people find their voice metaphorically speaking.

“The voice is a way of self-expression,” she says. “They can speak up to their landlords.”

The last Community of Voices choir is soon to finish its run for the study, and the data is still being collected and tabulated. One thing is for sure, though: The choirs were a hit. Once they finished participation in the study, all the previous choirs have continued to sing.

© Twin Cities Public Television - 2017. All rights reserved.



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4 Ways to Beat the Winter Blues

Use these 'light' tips to brighten your days.
By Patricia Corrigan for Next Avenue

When the sun wakes up late and slips away before the workday ends, when many a day is dark and gray, when it’s Groundhog Day and even an early spring seems far away, many large, hairy mammals — Punxsutawney Phil, included — choose to hibernate. But not us!

We slog through, knowing that the passage of time will bring brighter days ahead. But we can do more than wait it out. Here are four easy ways to beat the winter blues and create a little sunshine of your own:


1. Bring light to others’ lives

“I’m 87 years old and I can still finish The New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle,” a friend wrote in a holiday note to me. She added, “And I love hearing from you!”

My aunt, who is 86 and lives in rural Illinois, also likes hearing from me. The joy is evident in her voice when I call to report any new funny stories about my grandson or even when I call just to say hello.

I care about both these women, and about other distant friends as well. Talking with them brightens my day and theirs, too.

No matter how behind in life you are, consider making time right now to pick up the phone and bring some sunshine into the lives of your older relatives and friends.

After the call(s), keep that smile on your face. Research shows that when you smile, your mood elevates and you feel less stressed.

In an article for Forbes, Roger Dooley writes that if you smile in public, those around you will be lifted as well. “UCLA scientist Marco Iacoboni notes that our brains are wired for sociability,” Dooley reports. “In particular, if one person observes another person smile, mirror neurons in that person’s brain will light up as if he were smiling himself.” (Or herself, I’m certain.)


2. Open a box of light

 In mid-December, my friend Carol Porter posted this on Facebook: “I’m enjoying an early Christmas present to myself — my new light box! I sit next to it for 30 minutes daily, relaxing with coffee, calendar, notepad, tablet, organizing my day and thinking beautiful thoughts as the bright light bathes my retinas.”

When Carol complained of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) — also known as the winter blues — her doctor gave her a brochure about a company that makes several varieties of high-powered therapy lights and lamps.

 “A light box mimics outdoor light. Researchers believe this type of light causes a chemical change in the brain that lifts your mood and eases other symptoms of SAD,” says the Mayo Clinic. A light box may be an effective treatment on its own or, the Mayo Clinic adds, “in combination with an antidepressant medication or psychotherapy.”

Think you may suffer from SAD? The Mayo Clinic lists these symptoms:
• Irritability
• Tiredness or low energy
• Problems getting along with other people
• Hypersensitivity to rejection
• Heavy, “leaden” feeling in the arms or legs
• Oversleeping
• Appetite changes, especially a craving for foods high in carbohydrates
• Weight gain


Carol likes her lamp a lot. Sitting by it, she exhorts, “SAD, be gone!”


3. Light up the night

 Me, I like the dark. (Cue “Over at the Frankenstein Place,” from The Rocky Horror Picture Show, which starts out with this evocative line: “In the velvet darkness of the blackest night…” What, you’re not a fan?)

Night is when I write, read, listen to music and relax. I also like vanilla-scented candles, and one recent rainy evening I gathered up five of them, put them on a placemat in the middle of my dining room table and lit them all.

I turned off the lamps and then, with a clear sight line from the living room couch, I sat with a glass of wine, enjoying my impromptu candle party and the subtle scent of vanilla.


4. Treat your “defects” lightly

 “The truth is that the older I get, the more I like my defects. Old age is the best moment to be and do whatever you enjoy.” That’s Alma speaking. She’s the 81-year-old main character in Isabelle Allende’s book, The Japanese Lover: A Novel, about a woman who carries on a secret affair well into her later years. What’s especially intriguing about Alma’s quote is the encouragement to embrace our flaws and emphasize our eccentricities.

 Another important self-improvement tip comes from a recent book by Allen Klein, who insists it’s time to stop blaming other people for anything.You Can’t Ruin My Day: 52 Wake-Up Calls to Turn Any Situation Around is Klein’s 25th book on harnessing the power of humor to make a better life.

 “You are the only person who can ruin your day,” Klein writes. He says our reactions to any thought or action determines how we perceive that thought or action, and we have ultimate control over our reactions.

 To bolster his case, Klein, 77, quotes rabbis, Japanese proverbs, Desmond Tutu, Chinese philosophers, Pema Chodron (an American Buddhist nun) and even Alexander Pope, the 18th century poet.

 The gist of Klein’s message? Lighten up.


© Twin Cities Public Television - 2016. All rights reserved.



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7 Ways to Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions

Are you sabotaging yourself? Here's how you can fulfill your commitments.

By Linda Melone, CSCS for Next Avenue

Credit: Getty Images

It’s that time of year again. A new beginning, a clean slate. But how often do you actually make good on your New Year’s resolutions? If the answer is “not very,” you’ll want to read the seven ideas below that can help you follow through in 2017.

The start of a new year naturally creates incentive for making changes. Days that seem like transition points motivate people to take advantage of the “fresh-start effect,” research shows. Birthdays, the beginning of a semester, and the start of a new week all fall under this new transition time. Researchers at the Wharton School came to this conclusion after they discovered that visits to the university fitness center spiked during these turning points. Another study published in Psychological Science further backs this up. Participants found motivation from imagining a fresh start in the form of moving in to a new apartment. They were asked to imagine their new digs and also ranked their level of motivation to pursue their goals. Those who imagined that the move was their first one in nine years (versus an annual event) were more motivated to make progress on their goals.

This feeling of a new beginning appears to empower and make it easier to leave our past self and failures behind and embrace our new potential for success moving forward, researchers surmised. A new year represents a new chance to start over and try again.

However, “most people don’t keep their resolutions because they are more committed to making the resolution than following through,” says Gina Gomez, a certified life and business coach in Lake Forest, California. “In fact, only 8 percent of people who make resolutions actually achieve their goal. You must make the commitment and take action.”

Gomez and other experts offer the following tips for making this year the year you finally reach yours.

1. Get clear

You can’t get to your destination if you don’t know where you’re going, says Gomez. “If you want to lose weight, take that dream vacation, fall in love or watch more episodes of The Good Wife, get clear about what specifically you want and why you want it and identify at least three steps on how you’re going to get there.”

 2. Take the first step

Once you have a clear vision of what you want to accomplish, begin turning that into reality. “If you’re stuck, take the first step to finding the resources to help you achieve that goal,” says Gomez. This may include hiring a coach, reading travel books or signing up on a dating site.

 3. Follow through

It’s not enough just to plan and take the first step. Once you have your game plan, follow it. Think of your New Year’s resolution the way you would a business plan, says Gomez. “It does no good to have one if you don’t use it.” Set manageable goals, include some rewards, find an accountability partner and keep track of your progress. “This enables you to stay motivated and get consistent results,” she adds.

4. Reign yourself in

Ultimately, the ability to follow through on a New Year’s resolution involves the ability to regulate our impulses, says Timothy J. Bono, assistant dean for assessment and analytics at Washington University in St. Louis. “Our impulse might be to eat a lot of junk food or waste time on social media instead of using it more productively. To override those impulses, we need willpower, or what psychologists call self-regulatory strength.”

Bono likens strengthening willpower to becoming stronger physically. “If we can get ourselves to exercise willpower in small, everyday behaviors — maybe we resist the temptation to get the candy bar when we’re in the checkout line at the grocery store — those are the opportunities that allow our self-regulatory strength to grow.” The more you practice, the easier it becomes.

5. Expand your reach

In midlife, it’s tempting to have all your New Year’s resolutions focused on dealing with home life and empty nest syndrome if your kids have left, says Kristen Carpenter, director of Women’s Behavior Health at The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center. “A better approach is one that enhances multiple areas of your life. For example, resolving to live in the moment helps achieve both personal and career goals.”

6. Prioritize

A long list of resolutions makes it less likely you’ll be able to do all of them, so order them. “If you already feel as if you’re being spread too thin, you likely will not be able to keep multiple New Year’s resolutions,” says Carpenter. “To edit your list, first rank your resolutions in order of importance and then keep only the top few. This gives you a better chance of meeting your goals.”

7. Align yourself

Ask yourself if your resolutions align with your values, says Carpenter. “If you’re crafting resolutions that are not in line with your values [e.g., training for a triathlon that takes you away from your family for weeks at a time], reevaluate your list and replace the resolutions with ones that are more cohesive to your overall goals. Otherwise you’re setting yourself up to fail.”

Follow these expert tips to create your best year ever.

© Twin Cities Public Television - 2016. All rights reserved.



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For a Happier Holiday, Host a Family Sing-Along

5 great reasons to make music together this season
By Susan Darrow for Next Avenue

Credit: Thinkstock

This time of year, music often plays a big role in many people’s lives. School concerts,

religious choir performances, seasonal community events, holiday hits on the radio — all offer abundant opportunities to take advantage of the benefits of music for any age.

Since the magic of music is shining exceptionally bright now, this is a great time to encourage your family to use these opportunities as a springboard for making music throughout the year. Music can help families on many levels. It promotes development in babies and young children; bonds families across generations and stimulates areas of the brain involved with motivation, reward and emotion. Making, or listening to, music can actually result in increased levels of dopamine, a neurotransmitter that stimulates the brain’s reward system.

Here are five reasons to make music with your family this holiday season

:
1. Music-making is beneficial to development.

Music stimulates social, physical, cognitive and emotional development and promotes language and concentration skills, confidence and self-esteem. During the early years, active engagement with music promotes brain development and naturally supports growth essential to life and learning, as well as increasing the bond between children and their caregivers.

It’s easy to get started making music with children during the holidays: Sing your favorite carols in the car, dance to holiday songs or take children to a holiday concert or musical. A 2014 Harris Poll commissioned by the early-child music program Music Together (where I’m the CEO) revealed that only 17 percent of parents sing to their child daily. Music development is similar to language development. Imagine if parents only talked to their children once a day!

We teach children language by continuously talking and reading to them. Similarly, the best thing parents and grandparents can do to support musical growth is to sing and dance with their children and grandchildren as often as possible.

A growing body of research shows that participating in the arts promotes health and well being in older adults, too.

2. Music helps us create and recall powerful memories.

Music can spark the recall of lovely past experiences. It helps the past “come alive,” giving us access to deep feelings as we remember an event or moment. Singing while you decorate the tree, at a holiday party or at a religious celebration can help form memories and bonds with extended family and friends that will be recalled for years to come.

3. Music relieves stress.

The holidays, while joyful, can also be stressful. Singing can actually relieve stress. Studies show that singing has the ability to slow our pulse and heart rate, lower our blood pressure and decrease the levels of stress hormone in our bodies.

So, play music in the car while navigating the mall parking lot or sing along to a holiday recording while getting ready for company. It will help you stay calm and, most importantly, model for the children in your life a healthy way to deal with stress.

4. Music connects us.

The holidays can be lonely for some people. Singing, especially in groups, can relieve this loneliness by connecting us to others in ways that no other activity can. Recent research indicates that music-making as a shared experience can activate and synchronize similar neural connections in all those participating. This synchronization can result in feelings of empathy and shared intention that can promote positive social interaction and bonding.

When you sing with others this holiday season, whether during a religious service, at a community event or at a family gathering, everyone benefits.

5. Singing is intergenerational.

Music is an ageless way to connect with younger and older relatives and create ties between the youngest and oldest family members. Plus, music supports the aging processes. In later years, participating in music activities helps keep the brain active and engaged and supports us physically, socially and emotionally.

Sharing memories of holiday music-making and teaching those songs to younger generations can be joyous for both the older storytellers and the family members who are listening and forming new, pleasurable memories.

© Twin Cities Public Television - 2016. All rights reserved.



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5 Tips for Older Adults Navigating the Holiday Blues

Grief can get in the way, but don’t feel like you have to fake it

Credit: Thinkstock

By Emily Gurnon for Next Avenue

In the midst of frenetic advertising, pressure to shop for gifts and the ubiquitous seasonal music, the holidays can be an especially hard time if you’re depressed or missing a lost loved one.

The contrast between the “ideal” of the holiday and how we feel inside can be enormous, making the bad or painful feelings all the more pronounced.

“We feel guilty at this time of year if we personally cannot live up to the standard to be ever-cheerful and happy and joyful,” said Dr. Arthur Hayward, national clinical lead in elder care at Kaiser Permanente in Oakland, Calif.

Expectations for merriment and joy are high, Hayward said, as evidenced in holiday greeting cards.

“The wishes are not, ‘Have a pretty good Christmas’ or ‘Have an OK New Year,’ but ‘Have the best Christmas ever’ and ‘a very prosperous New Year,’” he said.

Different for Older Adults

For those who are still active, have children at home or have not yet retired, the holiday season can be a whirlwind of activity that feels draining.

Challenging in a different way may be the loneliness of older adults as friends die and family members move away. In a troubling new survey, a quarter of those 65 and older in England said they were not looking forward to Christmas this year, and many of those said it was because “the festive season brings back too many memories of loved ones who have passed away,” according to a poll for the British nonprofit Age UK released earlier this month.

Two-thirds of the 1,793 older adults surveyed reported that loneliness is exacerbated by the holiday season.

Recognizing that many feel a heavier burden of grief this time of year, some churches hold “Blue Christmas” or similar services. December is also the month in which Compassionate Friends, a group for people who have lost a child, holds candlelight ceremonies worldwide.

The Blues or Depression?

The shorter days during winter can contribute to Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD. This malady is not just “the blues,” but a type of major depression, according to the Mayo Clinic. People who are depressed may feel sad, hopeless or worthless; lose interest in things they used to enjoy; sleep too much or too little; have trouble concentrating; have little energy; notice changes in their appetite or weight or have thoughts of dying or suicide, the Mayo Clinic says.

If you feel that you or a loved one are suffering from depression, it’s important to seek treatment, Hayward said.

As difficult as the holidays can be, Hayward offered some advice for coping:

Tips for Getting Through the Season 

• Get plenty of rest. When you take care of your body, you will feel better. 
• Try to keep your expectations of the holiday modest. That may help prevent feelings of disappointment or of being let down. 
• Know that it is OK to feel sad or lonely. You don’t have to try to fake it to live up to the expectations of others. 
• Spend time with friends and other people you enjoy. Do things you want to do, not just the things you have to do. 
• It’s fine to say no sometimes. Wearing yourself out with too many activities will only make you feel worse. 

Tips for Family or Friends

• Ask your depressed loved one to do things with you, such as go for a walk or to a movie. If he or she says no, that’s OK. But do ask again in the future. 
• Ask how you can help in the person’s day-to-day life. You might do some housework, lawn care or errands. 
• Get your loved one to talk about happy memories. This may help him or her feel more a part of the celebration. 
• Listen when the person wants to talk. Don’t try to talk him or her out of sad feelings, but acknowledge them. 

© Twin Cities Public Television - 2016. All rights reserved.



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